‘Donald Trump, your fired’… By Donald Trump

Before I get into the post, I’d just like to explain that I haven’t been able to update this blog as regularly as before due to end of year university exams and essays. This post was actually written a while back but I never got round to finishing it due to the above mentioned reasons but I have tried to modify it as best as possible so its up-to-date. So in summary, exams & essays are pure evil and I hope you enjoy this scatter-brained post.  :)

So yesterday Donald Trump single-handedly crushed the dreams and ambitions of millions of comedians stateside… how did he do this I hear you ask? By saying that he would NOT be running for the US presidential office in 2012…. GUTTED.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not a Trump-fan policy or ideas wise…I just think he is comedic gold who channels the late greats before him like Sarah Palin and George Bush…he simply manages to carry the torch of Tom-Foolery onwards.

So now what? I guess we have got to pool our prayers and thoughts together and hope Sarah Palin makes a blast of a come-back and takes on the republican candidacy in the race for president. But until then, let’s all take a sweet, short and poignant look back at some of the gems that Trump bestowed on us *wipes tears*:

Let’s backtrack a slight bit.. for all those who don’t know who Donald Trump is. He is simply the  ‘Alan sugar’ of America…but only in the sense that he hosts the same show as  Alan Sugar which is ‘the apprentice’ but stateside…that’s where the similarity ends though. Still not completely sure of who he is character wise? Well simply imagine someone with the brains of Sarah Palin, the looks of Susan Boyle, and the arrogance of Piers Morgan/Simon Cowell but with nothing much to back it up save for a fortune bestowed on him by his parents. Point is, boi is putting the lemons out of business in the ‘sour’ department

So let’s look at some of the views Trump made in his fake-tease-of-a-run-up-to-presidency.

The current Political climate:

Trump: The American people are tired of being ripped off by their government officials, representatives and leaders

Fighting words Trumpy, fighting words. But in the rest of the interview in which he stated this point, he spent basically boasting about his excellent and finely tuned skills at ripping people off which has got him to where he is today…Not only that but he also bequeathed us with his strong moral compass directed at equality… Trump is no ordinary man, Trump is blind to our differences and rips off people equally regardless of their ethnicity, creed, nationality, religious belief etc. … *tears up* A man that stands for equality, I know, Martin Luther King would be so proud.

On being called a Racist:

Trump: I have a great relationship with the blacks

Unless boi is referring to Rebecca Black’s family….. Enough said.

On his response to Obama releasing his birth certificate to silence accusations by Trump and his fellow birthers that he was not born in America :

Trump: Today I am very proud of myself because I have accomplished something that nobody else has been able to accomplish

I agree Trump, compared to your lackluster track record of achievements…this IS an achievement of sorts. I bet Trump felt the same kind of pride people at passport control feel whenever they ask to see your passport and you oblige…Nothing tops that high… you can see it on their faces…they are all kinds of E-C-S-T-A-T-I-C

On Libya:

Mirroring what we are all feeling watching these devastating events unfold and the untimely death and murder of innocent civilians by a mad dictator…

Trump: Are the rebels from Iran? Are they From Al-Qaeda?

Spot on Trumpy…spot on.. Smart play involving Iran and Al-Qaeda, that’s the buzz word that gets everyone in a tizzy… Doesn’t matter if they aren’t actually in anyway involved with the conflict… you got to use them buzz words…though I am slightly disappointed  you didn’t mention North Korea, Syria, Godzilla, Voldemort etc. as possible candidates…but it was early days yet, I’m sure these big baddies would have got their time to razzle, dazzle and shine throughout you’re campaign.

On oil in the Middle East:

Trump: I’m interested in Libya if we take the oil, if we don’t take the oil ..No Interest.

And the same kind of mantra was espoused in relation to Iraq and  any other oil-producing state. But when presented with the question of what he thought the Arab countries would think or feel to the concept of his policy of ‘it’s-all-about-the-oil’ he replied > Who cares

Simply put let us re-phrase the wise musings of Antione Dodson to best sum up his stance and message :

“I’m invading your countries, I’m snatching your oil, so y’all need to hide your kids, hide your wife, hide your husband, ’cause I’m stealing everything out here.”

Trumpy, you could have borrowed this campaign slogan for free if you had decided to run for office. I’d have gladly waivered all copyrights entitlements to this along with Antoine Dodson to help you best get across your message

And if you don’t know who Antione Dodson is and this refrence made no sense check out this Youtube link :

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzNhaLUT520

r

Though the above mentioned topics only scratch the surface of Trump’s views and opinions, it’s the most I could cram into a post without this turning into a personal autobiography of sorts. And to bring this Turmp-fest to a close we will end with a quote by Trump released when he declared he wasn’t seeking to run for office

Trump: I maintain the strong conviction that if I were to run, I would be able to win the primary and ultimately, the general election”

And that folks…is why he WONT be running for office…it’s only ever fun or right to run when the odds are you’ll lose…

Till Next Time,

r

r

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Bin Laden Dead & Gone?

Ok so unless you have been living under an isolated rock of sorts you will probably already know the hoopla surrounding whether Osama Bin Laden is dead or not. There are conflicting views and that is mainly because the circumstances surrounding Osama Bin Laden’s death have been vague and mysterious to say the least. But I’m not here to re-hash the many different views or opinions on whether he is dead or not, rather what I’m going to talk about is how all these different scenarios still lead us to the same conclusion.

So the options surrounding what has happened mainly fit into these 3 categories:

1> Osama Bin Laden Is dead and the narrative given by the US is what occurred.

2> Osama Bin Laden is not dead and this is all a ruse to distract us from the issues at hand i.e. Middle East unrest.

3> Osama Bin Laden has been dead for a while or has died already and it’s now just coming to light as it is being used as propaganda for one reason or another by the US.

So those are the 3 main positions I have ascertained from people, if it isn’t exactly that, then it is something that is very similar to 1 of the 3 points.So regardless which camp you fit into let me tell you how regardless what you believe the aftermath is the same. Here are the facts:

Osama Bin Laden was already rumored to be very ill due to kidney failure and was already on a dialysis machine. He was an old man stricken with illness and was therefore a shadow of the man he was before. Regarding Al-Qaeda Osama Bin Laden was never really the brains behind the operation; he was more a figurehead and leader and had a devoted team around him that helped him execute plans or decisions. But this network had been greatly diminished in strength, size, importance and capability if not completely demolished. This is mainly because of the many US led attacks on the organization and the many members that have been killed off or arrested in the time between 9/11 till now. So overall, the operation was a hollow shell of its former self.

So what about all the failed attacks we saw occurring in the US by so called Al-Qaeda members i.e. shoe-bomber? Well the attacks we have seen in the past few years where actually those orchestrated by self-made small Al-Qaeda type cells like the one in Yemen that spurned the failed shoe-bomber attack. So these weren’t really branches from the organization but more a fact of groups trying to emulate and share in the familiarity associated with an already world-renowned and recognizable network like Al-Qaeda.

So what now? Basically, regardless of whether he is dead or not, or died a while ago Osama Bin Laden and the original Al-Qaeda network he spurned is no longer the main focus or worry for many state leaders and terror analysts. His irrelevance has been greatly highlighted especially by the recent Middle Eastern uprisings. Reform and revolution were simply brought about by the people on the ground and not by Al-Qaeda. The so-called and self-imposed ‘bastions of change’ were noticeable by their absence as the nation’s people showed how much can be done through simple unity and determination. A case in point being the fact that Osama Bin Laden released a tape calling for the overthrow of Mubarak a WEEK after Mubarak had already been overthrown by the Egyptian people.

So in summary, I don’t mourn nor care much for Osama Bin Laden and the twisted organization he founded. Mainly because he not only caused countless innocent deaths but also tainted a region’s people and religion.  The people in the Middle East have managed to swell the hearts of their nations with pride and honor through pacifism and unity, something which Osama Bin Laden never could or did. He divided rather than united, destroyed instead of built. He is the antithesis to the brave uprisings we see occurring in the Middle East.  He is an irrelevant and unnecessary stain in the narration of the momentous and historical events we see unfolding in the Middle East. The perceptions of him greatly outpace the reality of the situation. A man whose time was up well before his death.

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Till Next Time,

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