Talkin’ about news & Stuff….& possibly things.
Egypt Referendum & Newton Shooting
Tag Archives: Egypt
I got 99 problems and Iran is all of them
Today an Israeli newspaper reported that Israeli Prime Minister Benjimin Netenyahu and his Defense minister would like to attack Iran’s nuclear sites before the November U.S elections. Despite their strident views they lack crucial support both within their cabinet and their military. That coupled with the fact that If a war with Iran was to be launched this would considerably shake and rupture the bedrock of ties between Israel and the US as the latter country has made it clear about its desire to avoid any conflict of sorts.
Israel Israel Israel, what are we going to do with you and your fixated paranoia? If Israel was a person by now there would be a restraining order out on its ass. The problem with all this isn’t that Israel has a problem with Iran, after all, many countries do, it’s how it goes about justifying and then exaggerating its problems. The ironic fact about this latest report by Israel is that US officials only just yesterday released a report highlighting that Iran is not only not on the verge of having a nuclear weapon but that Tehran has not even made a decision on whether or not it should pursue one. Now how Netanyahu missed this tid bit of information goes beyond me, but what this statement does is virtually punch massive holes into Israel’s current war rampant tirade.
This Israeli paranio and ‘blame Iran’ mantra was even extended to the recent attacks in Egypt which left 16 Egyptian border police dead. Israel was quick on the mark, pointing the finger startlingly at Iran. This claim against Iran is largely unfounded as even when Israel accused it of the attack it didn’t offer up a shred of evidence to justify its claim. This kind of behavior literally reminds me of playground politics. It’s like when there is a kid you don’t like in nursery because he has taken your shovel in the sand pit whilst you were busy dilly dallying about with bucket… you try and snatch it back (in kids terms that amounts to; excuse me sir, but I happen to notice that thou has attained thee’s shovel whilst thy was unaware) but the kid refuses to hand it back…so you shove over a plant pot and when asked what happened automatically say ‘Ayatollah did it’…….even though you are at home and a week has passed by and said Ayatollah is holidaying in Iran (Came together nicely in the end didn’t it?).
Now yea that analogy is a complete curve ball and if you think about it doesn’t reeeeeeally make that much sense but I just wanted to give a young kid named Ayatollah his 5 seconds of fame in this drama. Point is Israel, stop waging war on an unimagined reality. You don’t need to make-up vices against Iran to have a grudge against the country. The more you fabricate the less ingenious any of your claims will be. Plus, you know the people at the top in Israel are waning in their judgment (more so than usual) when they are ready to throw the towel in with the US for the sake of meting out this undue punishment to Iran. The funny thing is, Iran and Israel are two faces of the same coin in many respects. They both like throwing around wild accusations at their enemies whilst turning a blind eye to their disdainful policies back home. They both like to take on this ‘me against the world’, ‘David vs Goliath’ attitude when it comes to defining their place on the world map. Also they are both largely seen to be pariahs in the region they reside in. So yea, practically twins.
Basically put your spears and war paint away Israel and settle right down … because unless you’re looking to be the newly added member of the Expandables cast, you’ve got no reason to be going anywhere with your battle cry, anytime soon.
Casualty: Mubarak Addition
One of the things that had continually dogged the Mubarak trial had been the health status of Hosni Mubarak. With the ending of the trial on Saturday, which convicted Mubarak of having failed to intervene to stop the killings of protesters, questions regarding his deteriorating health continue to enlist coverage. Since the trials had begun Mubarak had been in and out of hospital and had also demanded to be carried into court on a stretcher re-emphasizing his overall ‘fragile’ state and health.
Now some of you may point to all this as simple theatrics. Some of you may point to Mubarak maybe having ulterior motives in his depiction of himself as a weak and frail man. So he can enlist sympathy? So he can engender concerns over a breach of his Human Rights? Maybe he has his eyes on a particular prize. An Emmy? Dare say an Oscar? Since he has lost the presidential seat he might be looking for a back-up career as a Hollywood method actor.
No No, I say. That is not what all this hoopla surrounding his health is about. It’s all a misunderstanding, and if anything, Mubarak has been in fact, wronged. Don’t believe me? Take a gander at some of the points listed below:
Firstly, Mubarak’s health further deteriorated on Monday after a visit from his wife Suzanne Mubarak who sobbed at the sight of Muabarak in his blue prison suit. I understand your pain Suzanne…. How could they do this to your husband? BLUE PRISION SUIT? Have you no sense of shame or ounce of morality Egypt? You know that BLUE isn’t his color. It clearly does nothing for his complexion and washes out his face without bringing due attention to his eyes. Savages.
But if this fashion faux pas isn’t enough to engender your sympathy for Mubarak then maybe recanting some of these events may sway you. See if you can stomach this. Right after his sentencing on Saturday Mubarak was transferred directly from the court by helicopter to Cairo prison hospital. Mubarak reportedly cried and tried to resist leaving the helicopter. Why I hear you cry? Because Mubarak was insisting he instead be flown to his luxury suit were he had been held during his trial. Mubarak…selfless as always. You see Mubarak didn’t want to trouble the doctors and nurses in the hospital with his ailments as it would divert undue attention from their care of other patients at their facility and therefore inevitably lead to an increase in their workload. He, like the selfless hero he is, instead wanted to tough it out ‘bear- grylls’ style in the harsh and barren conditions of his luxury suite. Brave man…. Putting others before himself.
But then I hear you ask, why was he seen on a stretcher being carried in and out of court throughout his trial? Surely if the man is not well enough to walk into nor sit in court he should be in a proper medical facility which can afford him the treatment he so desperately needs rather than holed up in the confines of his luxury non-medical abode? To this I say you are misunderstanding the situation. This is a clear case of Hosni simply being thoughtful. The man was simply thinking of the health of the people carrying his stretcher. He saw that a few people needed some extra bicep and tricep action and so offered to be there ‘weight-training-man’. He was simply giving them their dose of exercise for the day which as any well informed individual knows, is integral to leading a healthy and balanced lifestyle.
But on a serious note, Mubarak, man the F’ up. The sympathy afforded to you and the treatment you have received while being held on trial is a million times more gracious than that afforded to the political dissidents, martyrs, protesters and revolutionaries whom you crushed, repressed, tortured and beat in your quest to retain power. The tears and theatrics you and your family spill mean nothing in the wake of the destruction and corruption of your rule. You have had the wish of having your son Gamal Mubarak moved to a nearby cell near you granted. The people you held, tortured and who died in your prisons were never afforded the means to say farewell to their loved ones and family let alone having any of their wishes granted. They weren’t afforded luxury suits while they waited trial, hell most of them never even got a day in court to face the ‘charges’ brought against them.
They say you reap what you sow, but if that was true, you would be sowing a painful existence rather than a mere inconvenience to your living standards.
Disgraceful
Now I know this news story is a bit late in the posting, especially considering the events that have transpired recently in Egypt, but I feel so strongly about this that I think it deserves to be addressed.
3 days ago around 400 Christians where attacked whilst marching through the neighborhood of Shubra in Cairo to mark the end of 40 days of mourning after previous sectarian clashes claimed the lives of 27 people. Attackers reportedly threw rocks and broken glass at the marchers injuring 10 people. The attackers are suspected to be supporters of Gamal Saber, an ultraconservative Islamist candidate running in Egypt’s parliamentary elections.
This is an utterly disgraceful act. This absolutely sickens and angers me, the Christians who formed a human chain to protect the Muslims as they prayed during the protests highlighted the epitomy of what Egypt is and should be. It saddens me to see how fast some people forget the unity that brought down Mubarak’s rule. This tedious and utterly irrelevant divide that people construct to create a feeling of ‘us vs. ‘them’ should be wholeheartedly condemned. Remember Egyptians come in all colors, creeds, forms and beliefs. Discrimination is not what any of the BRAVE Egyptians who fought (and continue to fight) in Tahrir square stood for.
Divided we fall. United we stand
Revolution Lives On
At least five people have been killed in a violent assault by the Egyptian army and police to evict protesters from Cairo’s Tahrir Square. Hundreds of soldiers and police, backed by armored personnel carriers, used teargas, rubber bullets and batons to evict several thousand protesters from the square that was at the heart of the popular uprising that toppled former president Hosni Mubarak a mere nine months ago.
The mass protests were held to protest against the current ruling military Junta (Supreme Council of the Armed Forces) who are seen by many Egyptians to be preserving the institutional rule of the past and therefore threatening Egypt’s future.
Now, the fact that Egyptians are still protesting isn’t something that should be simply decried. On the contrary, it should be something that’s in some way applauded. Why? Because in the run up to Mubarak’s toppling all the nay sayers could be heard saying something along these lines: ‘Even if Mubarak goes…nothing will change…someone will come in to replace him’. It would simply be a case of a different leader but the same type of leadership.
What has the recent protests in Tahrir shown? That the people who fought for this, bled for this, sacrificed for this WON’T let their efforts go to waste..won’t let their efforts get hijacked by a few enriched elite…won’t let the status quo rule again..won’t let their country slide backwards instead of move forwards…won’t let their children grow up in a world that was no different to theirs.
It’s dam well not perfect and its not easy, but no one who has studied revolutions or history would dare tell you any different.. but it’s all you have…. and by far..it is better then what you had.
In a revolution, as in a novel, the most difficult part to invent is the end ~ Alexis de Tocqueville
Nothing in life worth having comes easy
How do you solve a problem like Saudi?
Saudi..Saudi.. Saudi….aghh…What a little old conundrum you are. Where do you even begin when there are so many contradictions to pick from.
I personally think many of the problems in the Middle East can be directly linked to that oil-rich monarchical piece of land. It’s as much to do with the monarchy as it has to do with the oil. Because of its geopolitical situation and because it pumps out 55% of the world’s oil the west is keen to keep it sweet and stable. It also doesn’t mind acting like the west’s lackey every now and then as long as it gets to do as it pleases in its nation without scrutiny, criticism or comment. So think of its relationship with the west as a symbiotic corrupt rave.
But let’s bring these back to recent events which highlight how Saudi Arabia likes to react to the revolutionary atmosphere that has swept the Middle East.
Well, when it occurred in Egypt King Abdullah was non-to-pleased. He threw his own version of a hissy fit over the phone with Obama saying that if he pulls his military aid budget from Egypt he would personally make sure that Saudi picked up the tab and cost. Not only that, but boi was not happy about the tone Obama used towards Mubarak, he wasn’t being ‘supportive’ enough.
Alright just to jog people’s memories a bit, let’s remind ourselves of some of the *best loved * phrases that were used during that time period:
‘Orderly Transition’ ‘Restraint on both sides’..
Yea that’s about it….I know…FREAKIN HARDBALL BIGMAN words being thrown about the place….if words could cut…these bad bois would have sliced and diced you in no time.
But on a serious note anything other than America having literally espoused these words while sat lovingly on the lap of Hosni Mubarak couldn’t have made their reaction to the events any tamer. They only started talking in more blunt and harsh terms when Mubarak was literally packed suitcase in hand and out the freaking door. But yet King Abdullah apparently couldn’t stomach this…wait till he gets ahold of what people say about him behind his back/across-the-atlantic-since-they-fear-and-value-their-lives-and-don’t-actually-like-the-idea-of-being-jailed-and-maybe-killed…boi is gonna be FUUUUUU-ming
Now if that wasn’t enough, it was also revealed later on that King Abdullah personally spoke to Mubarak during the protests and URGED him to crack down harder on his protests….yes…apparently thugs with sticks, stones, Knives, guns, bombs and PIMP-MY-RIDE camels and donkeys to boot just don’t cut it with him…its Go big or go home with King Abdi *yea he is getting a nickname*…all out bloodshed or nothing..
And we can clearly see what King Abdi would have liked to see unfold in Egypt with the events occurring currently in Bahrain. What’s worse is that the Bahraini security forces where already clearly cracking down hard on the protesters before the Saudi troops were sent in…as there where many deaths and injuries reported and recorded on video footage. But apparently that wasn’t enough. Big Daddy had to get involved and show ‘em how it’s really done. And so Big Pappi has sent in the ground troops to ‘bolster’ the forces and bring a quick and ‘decisive’ end to the protests going on in Bahrain… I think the most striking thing is that this is the first time I have seen the Saudi troop being used properly in any type of battle scenario…. and it’s against other Arabs and Muslims… doesn’t sound really Islamic from the get-go but go figure… Hypocrisy wouldn’t be their middle name if they didn’t act hypocriticaly .
Now I won’t go into detail into why King Abdullah feels the need to get involved, as I don’t think his rabid thought process deserves the time of day or justification, but to summarize it for those who aren’t aware, it basically revolves around his inherent fear and paranoia about the Shia unrest in Bahrain spilling into his back garden and spurring the Shia in the Eastern province of Saudi to rise up against him. So therefore quell the protest in Bahrain bloodily in his eyes, and you’ll fix the problem….yea…like I said…really doesn’t deserve the time of day. Especially considering that all the recent protests in the Middle East have highlighted that the more people die and the more bloody the conflict, the more ardent the protesters get to achieve their goals and the more courageous and far-reaching their- demand’s get. But common sense doesn’t seem to be an important thought process in his eyes.. he likes to take a more Gaddafi-esque approach.. he’s all for the latest trends and apparently this is all the rage.
Which then moves me onto the small protests in Saudi. The reasons why the protests haven’t really gotten off have been due to heavy police presence on the roads and citizens being warned explicitly that if they protest they will simply be jailed. This has already occurred with the few brave protesters who have managed to hit the streets. The King has also done what he does best and made it rain dollar dollar bills to try and appease some of the population and keep them content and complacent. Not only that but to show how seriously the monarchy fears the whole unraveling of a protest type movement they have even wheeled out the tried and tested ‘religion’ card…oh yes…they have ‘consulted’ *aka basically told them they better back them up one way or another, proof or no proof, or they can say hello to spending the rest of their lives in the god dam clinker* with the ‘scholars’ and have issued a fatwa *religious ruling* banning protests…. Yes…how ‘convenient’.
It just astounds me how BLATENLTY the monarchy can flaunt the fact it can use and twist religion to suit its own selfish ends and to secure its seat of power….this IS a case of a country turning into a ruler-ship cult where everything that matters revolves around the monarchy.
Out of all countries I think Saudi is the one that grinds my gears the most, not only are the ruling family a bunch of self-proclaimed hypocrites, but they wrongly claim to embody an ‘islamic’ kingdom…so not only tarnishing the lives of its people, but also tainting the name of the religion in the eyes of people around the world.
Unfortunately this blog post is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to Saudi but to save this from turning into a book this is the most I could really put in. But for all those wanting to read roughly more about the protests in Bahrain consult *how formal am I.. I’d fit right in with the Queen* my previous blog post on Bahrain. It sketches out things briefly.
Till Next Time,
‘Statesman’, ‘Salesman’ or plain ol’ git?
So the inspiration for this post comes from David Cameron’s recent lil treck round the Middle East *I know I know.. I am so early with these posts you’re questioning if I’m actually an Arab after all*. There was controversy surrounding his trip, but before I get into those details how about we pander to the whims of the current government and describe what they would like you to think happened:
After the brave Egyptians followed the example of the Tunisian people and overthrew their corrupt dictator Mr Cameron decided to valiantly ride his metaphorical white horse and head straight to the Middle East to congratulate the recent success of the Egyptians in Tahrir Square. Being the big-hearted man that he is he didn’t restrict his visit just to Egypt, no, he made the effort to spread the love around in the region and show his support, goodwill and solidarity with the Arab people who had fought so tirelessly for justice, democracy and freedom. Also by being the first western leader to grace the shores of the Middle East since the revolutionary atmosphere had first begun, Mr. Cameron was honorably setting a high-standard precedent for other less courageous leaders to hopefully follow in his graceful footsteps.
Oh that Cameron, such a strong-willed charismatic and moral leader. *swoon*
Well…unfortunately we don’t live in the world of make-believe and fairytale. Instead we have to deal with the crass and cumbersome harsh light of reality.
In actual fact this trip to the Middle East was planned ages ago and had nothing to do initially with the revolutions we see sweeping across the Middle East. Instead it had more to do with an important Arms trade fair that was going to be occurring in Abu Dhabi…yes…girls we aren’t the only ones who are susceptible to the shopping frenzy…our grown-ass male leaders seem to have a soft spot for it to. Mr Cameron being the ‘great’ leader had planned to go to this fair and use this all-round trip to generally hawk off British arms to the so called ‘leaders’ of the Middle East with the help of his delegation of arms manufacturers.
To be honest, I just think Mr Cameron has probably watched Sex and the City 2 and seen how Carrie and the girls flew off to this exotic middle eastern region in Abu Dubai and thought ‘I want me some of that’. But of course to save face he had to bring in some ‘macho’ into the equation and so instead of the sex and the city girls of ‘Miranda, Charlotte & Samantha’ he brought along the British arms dealers. And with them in tow he could set off for the joys of sun, sand and selling-arms-to-corrupt-undemocratic-repressive-arab-leaders-to-make-a-quick-buck in the Middle East.
But on a serious note, what an utter affront and disrespect to the many brave souls who have lost their lives and are STILL loosing their lives fighting in these revolutions. The LEAST he could have done was at least to suspend and postpone the arm selling aspect of his trip considering the circumstances. Especially when you are selling them to current undemocratic dictators ….just WTH …the nerve of him to stand in Tahrir square and extoll the notions of democracy, freedom, human rights etc. and praise the virtues of the revolutionary uprising and then to simply hop-skip it to nearby dictatorship countries and sell some more arms beggars belief.
No words can rightfully completely justify and excuse their actions..…but with them being in the profession of politics you can ALWAYS rely on them to try and give excuses to legitimate their sorry actions. So here are a few I have heard/read:
Cameron actually cancelled his appearance at the actual Arms fair: oh yes .. thank you for that Cameron…that’s really what matters…not the fact that your arm’s dealer BFF’s have been flown in with you and are STILL selling their wares and arms .. It was the idea of you being their personal Pin-Up model at the fare that really grinded our gears. A publicity stunt at the arms fair like you are some hired Paris Hilton totty at a club we can’t stomach….the actual issue of the arms still being sold by the people you have flown in as part of your delegation is dismissible.
Only a quarter of the people who flew out with him where part of the arms group: Stop the PRESS! ONLY a quarter? My bad, My bad, and here was I thinking it was a THIRD of your delegation. If that’s the case that’s just A-OK…but it best be EXACTLY a quarter…anything above that is asking for trouble. Has no one told you that anything-above-of-a-quarter –of-whatever-delegation-you-are-taking is a crowd? Too-many-people-over-a-quarter-of-your-delegation spoil the broth? Don’t worry you haven’t heard these age old-sayings because now you are in the know.
If we don’t sell arms to them then other countries will: Wow…Really? Would you allow this choice of phrase or excuse in any other circumstance? I.e. Hey don’t get your panties in a twist, if WE didn’t sell Iran/Al-Qaeda/Syria/Every-Tom-Dick-and-Harry-that’s-on-the-wests-axis-of-evil-list nuclear weapons then someone else would have … *shucks*…you KNOW it’s all about the profit margin ay?
The leaders won’t actually use most of the weapons sold on their people as they are more warfare than internal repression arms: Yes so maybe for example, Saudi Arabia won’t use F-16 bombers on their people. That will mainly be because of the fact that even if they wanted to they probably can’t. .. many of the arms that are sold to the gulf states and other states in the region are to high-tech and advanced for the countries to actually operate or even maintain or sustain in workable conditions without help from the west. So why do these leaders buy these weapons? It’s mainly because the ‘politicians’ who buy these weapons for their country usually skim off or get some commission from the transaction. This therefore means the countries MONEY is being wasted in corrupt ways to benefit the pockets of the few over the mass of the countries people.
So in conclusion, Mr. Cameron is not simply a TYPICAL political git …. Cameron ‘luv’, please leave the blatant and insulting two-faced aspect of your current approach to politics to THEEEE experts…by experts I mean dam COINS and Tony Freaking lar-di-dar- Blair. Put to rest the cheap knock-off tribute act to your apparent idol Tony Blair. It’ll be not only for our own good, but yours. There is only so much ‘bastardisation’ one can handle in the world, and the quota is currently full to the brim.
Till Next Time,
P.S I didn’t make this picture myself, stumbled upon it and thought it fitted the post perfectly 
Here is link if your interested:
http://www.schnews.org.uk/archive/news760.php
Viva La Revolution EGYPTIAN style!
Right off the bat I want to congratulate all the fearless Egyptians who have come out throughout these protests to voice their rights and unequivocally demand that they be recognized and heard. That also includes the many brave souls and hero’s who have risked and lost their lives in this movement. May you rest in peace and may your actions resonate throughout time in the hearts of every Egyptian. It’s a bittersweet moment knowing that those who risked the most cannot be part of the joy and celebration that all the Egyptians are participating in today
But I do think the question that people will be faced with after the celebrations and festivities have died down will be what happens next? It’s important that things are not left up in the air as the revolution of change does not simply stop with the door hitting Mubarak forcefully on the way out. So here is my brief summary about some overall important points:
Firstly, the fact that Mubarak has been forced out is of course in itself an amazing achievement ..It’s also very powerfully symbolic as it shows that no leader can claim to be immune from the movement and will of his people… It’s also helps in making the remaining corrupt, dictatorial and autocratic Arab leaders hopefully shake uncontrollably in their custom-designed-fur-lined-dolled-up-gold-embroidered-slippers… in other words the demand for sleeping pills will shoot up drastically as restless nights take their toll…so if anyone is looking to make a quick buck that’s a heads up to which shares you should invest in. If the guy who gives extra strong super-glue a run for its dam money *on what can act as better adhesive to the throne of power* can eventually haul on out than ANYONE is susceptible to getting the Alan Sugar ‘Your fired’ dress down.
But Mubarak didn’t of course survive as long as he did in throes of power without having sweetened the deal for the people he has placed around him. So therefore anyone who is seen to be a dummy or cronie of Mubarak should be also swiftly shown the door….. preferably the door of the garbage disposal chute… when the disease -ridden head rolls the body should swiftly follow… and that includes that TWAT Suleiman who i think has proven that no matter who you are, there is always some prick waiting in the wings who will eclipse you at whatever area you choose to specialise in… in Mubarak’s case…that area is : Bastard-ness…yep Mubarak…you officially have someone you can favourably contrast yourself against..
These changes need to be coupled with a complete overhaul and reform of the flawed constitution and electoral process. This will allow things like limits to presidential term to be added so that no one else will be able to do a ‘Mubarak’….if the constitution and electoral process are not addressed fairly and properly, then the foundations of democracy will be weak and anything that is built on it will be inherently shaky and susceptible to failure.
And another thing is that caution should be exercised with regards to the military who are now effectively in power…. that is for the simple reason that Mubarak himself and the presidents that have preceded him have all come from the military……coupled with the fact that the many heads of the military are BFF’s with Mubarak … I heard they even have those tacky BFF necklaces … someone needs to tell them that’s SO 2000 & late.. Plus the proof that they receive millions in funding from the U.S means that people should be wary of where their loyalties actually lie….And by the military I’m only really referring to the top brass…not the brave underlings who have generally shown that their loyalties are to the Egyptian people first and foremost.
So therefore the interm government that will rule and look after things till elections are actually held should include the opposition figures that have been instrumentally part off and supportive of the movements in and out of Tahrir square and who have stood firmly by the Egyptian people.
This is an unprecedented moment in the history of the Middle East and the momentum should not be lost as this change can hopefully reform not only Egypt’s destiny but the destiny of the whole region…
Egypt is, after all, Om El-Donia: Mother of the world
Till Next Time,
FML: mini Prequel to BS Part 3
I NEVER thought I’d have to cover his speeches as far as i have but what can i say…this guy has some NERVE….if the sequel was a flop you can only guess where the trilogy is going to land him with critics….what was worse…he modelled this piece of crap nearly word for word on the last piece of crap… didn’t even bother to spruce it up…I’m thinking along with the demands of Mubarak taking a long overdue hike, protesters should also demand he take his dam speech writer with him….it’s a recession i know…but come on that’s no excuse….even my nan could have written a more appropriate and in-touch-with-reality speech…and she has passed away..R.I.P Nana.. sorry to drag your name into this sorry mess.
Not only did he not deliver once again on any one of the demands the people wanted…but he ALSO made people stomach his whole speech and appearance for nothing…It’s not easy to look at the human manifestation of the Muppet count Dracula… That shizzle is just un-natural to say the least.. He could have ATLEAST put a dam paper bag over his head…I’m thinking ‘just for men’ would have loved it if he did…their shares have dropped drasticly ever since people have realised how un-naturaly dark Mubarak’s hair is.
Until I get a transcript of the speech this lil mini-rant will have to do
As soon as I get it I will of course obligingly make it more palatable for the reader by adding some commentary…. At least you’ll know whatever ill add onto the speech will never be as bad as the tripe that’s already in the speech….
Till Next time,
BS Speech part 2: The Sequel
As we all know sequels usually flop…and this speech is no exception to that rule. So here we go again with another off-the-tracks speech orchestrated by Mubarak to answer the calls and cries of his people….In true off-my-god-dam-rocker form he has of course done anything but that and instead answered his own selfish calls to try and stay on for as long as possible….
I think this basically sums up Mubarak’s mental state: At one point near the end of the speech he refers to himself in THIRD person which is a clear sign of where he stands on the mental scale of things…off-his-freaking-head.
Once again here is the speech with added commentary:
WARNING: anyone allergic to CHEESE and BULLS**** should avoid going any further….also, anyone with a nut allergy should steer clear from this nut job’s speech to.
I talk to you during critical times that are testing Egypt and its people which could sweep them into the unknown *Because all they have known is my dam face for 30 god dam years*. The country is passing through difficult times and tough experiences which began with noble youths and citizens who practise their rights to peaceful demonstrations and protests, expressing their concerns and aspirations but they were quickly exploited by those who sought to spread chaos and violence, confrontation and to violate the constitutional legitimacy and to attack it *oooh crap…I’ve given away the plot for tomorrows riots by my thugs….crap…crap…I’ve really gotta think before I speak more often…come to think of it maybe I shouldn’t push myself mentally…I’ve only just learnt how to spell the word ‘democracy’ …kept reading it on the people’s signs so it kind of just sunk in… have no f’n clue what it means though.. a nickname for me? *.
Those protests were transformed from a noble and civilised phenomenon of practising freedom of expression to unfortunate clashes, mobilised and controlled by political forces that wanted to escalate and worsen the situation *that’s a shout-out to my beloved Egypt weezy crew and their camels, horses and donkey’s…RESPECT… riot if you can hear me bois… Literally*. They targeted the nation’s security and stability through acts of provocation theft and looting and setting fires and blocking roads and attacking vital installations and public and private properties and storming some diplomatic missions.
We are living together painful days and the most painful thing is the fear that affected the huge majority of Egyptians and caused concern and anxiety over what tomorrow could bring them and their families and the future of their country *as opposed to the fear the population held beforehand of the secret services and the police… that’s the GOOD kind of fear…Just like Bacteria people…their are good and bad kinds.. think of the previous type of fear as the activia fear.. dam well good for you*.
The events of the last few days require us all as a people and as a leadership to chose between chaos and stability and to set in front of us new circumstances and a new Egyptian reality which our people and armed forces must work with wisely and in the interest of Egypt and its citizens
Dear brothers and citizens, I took the initiative of forming a new government with new priorities and duties that respond to the demand of our youth and their mission *and by that I mean my demands and the demands of…you guessed it my beloved and adored crew*. I entrusted the vice president with the task of holding dialogue with all the political forces and factions about all the issues that have been raised concerning political and democratic reform and the constitutional and legislative amendments required to realise these legitimate demands and to restore law and order but there are some political forces who have refused this call to dialogue, sticking to their particular agendas without concern for the current delicate circumstances of Egypt and its people *really hope this time no one calls my bluff…I used long and important sounding words people … so if it doesn’t impress you… what gives?*.
In light of this refusal to the call for dialogue and this is a call which remains standing, I direct my speech today directly to the people, its Muslims and Christians, old and young, peasants and workers, and all Egyptian men and women in the countryside and city over the whole country.
I have never, ever been seeking power and the people know the difficult circumstances that I shouldered my responsibility and what I offered this country in war and peace, just as I am a man from the armed forces and it is not in my nature to betray the trust or give up my responsibilities and duties * yea I never sought power…it sought me…It kept courting me and harassing me till I just had to give in…it sent flowers, chocolates and even wrote me touching love struck poems….I can’t help it people…I’m a sucker for romance…and since we have spent 30 blissful years together.. I can’t help but stick faithfully by it…it loves me and I love it…and that’s all that matters…plus…it pays my hefty bills..*
My primary responsibility now is security and independence of the nation to ensure a peaceful transfer of power in circumstances that protect Egypt and the Egyptians and allow handing over responsibility to whoever the people choose in the coming presidential election.
I say in all honesty and regardless of the current situation that I did not intend to nominate myself for a new presidential term *Yea…i know my limits people…30 years or so is just about enough of Hosni Mubarak being president….out with the old and in with the new I say…the new being Gamal Mubarak…See I was planning to give u a new snazzier Mubarak upgrade till you guys messed it up*. I have spent enough years of my life in the service of Egypt and its people
I am now absolutely determined to finish my work for the nation in a way that ensures handing over its safe-keeping and banner … preserving its legitimacy and respecting the constitution
I will work in the remaining months of my term to take the steps to ensure a peaceful transfer of power *from me to someone else like me…I’m taking this search for a tribute act of me seriously*.
According to my constitutional powers, I call on parliament in both its houses to discuss amending article 76 and 77 of the constitution concerning the conditions on running for presidency of the republic and it sets specific a period for the presidential term. In order for the current parliament in both houses to be able to discuss these constitutional amendments and the legislative amendments linked to it for laws that complement the constitution and to ensure the participation of all the political forces in these discussions, I demand parliament to adhere to the word of the judiciary and its verdicts concerning the latest cases which have been legally challenged. * I have no idea what all I just said means.. Thank god for speech writers.. come-to-think of it I don’t think I’ve ever read the constitution….I thought the constitution was simply whatever came out of my mouth…you learn something new every day I suppose*.
I will entrust the new government to perform in ways that will achieve the legitimate rights of the people and that its performance should express the people and their aspirations of political, social and economic reform and to allow job opportunities and combating poverty, realising social justice *shit I think I just mixed up my notes…don’t think anyone will realise that I’m harping on about the same crap I harped on about in my first speech.. if they do…ill just say I’m doin my bit for the environment and simply recycling.. can’t argue with my green fingered-ness*.
In this context, I charge the police apparatus to carry out its duty in serving the people, protecting the citizens with integrity and honour with complete respect for their rights, freedom and dignity. I also demand the judicial and supervisory authorities to take immediately the necessary measures to continue pursuing outlaws and to investigate those who caused the security disarray and those who undertook acts of theft, looting and setting fires and terrorising citizens *Dam should have worded that more selectively…under those rules I’m as good as f***** *.
This is my pledge to the people during the last remaining months of my current term:
I ask God to help me to honour this pledge to complete my vocation to Egypt and its people in what satisfies God, the nation and its people. *This religion card NEVER gets old.*
Dear citizens, Egypt will emerge from these current circumstances stronger, more confident and unified and stable. And our people will emerge with more awareness of how to achieve reconciliation and be more determined not to undermine its future and destiny.
*Someone call up the nearest mental institute and reserve a bed because we have a right old cracker coming in*> Hosni Mubarak who speaks to you today is proud of the long years he spent in the service of Egypt and its people. This dear nation is my country, it is the country of all Egyptians, here I have lived and fought for its sake and I defended its land, its sovereignty and interests and on this land I will die and history will judge me and others for our merits and faults. The nation remains. Visitors come and go but ancient Egypt will remain eternal, its banner and safekeeping will pass from one generation to the next. It is up to us to ensure this in pride and dignity.
So once again…he is managed to pull off another BS heavy speech…and in such a short time…what a ‘special’ person.
Till Next time,
